All's gone when you're: a eulogy

Oh wow, my blog is filled with cobwebs.

I guess the little hiatus went a little long...

Fact is, was really busy with Ezidelivery.

Wasn't quite myself for quite a couple of months,

I'm glad things are slower now and I can take big big breathers!

(back to busy in a month's time though).

Anyway, I would like to share the eulogy for my dad I've written and featured in last Sunday's Zaobao here.

It's gonna be 2 years in a few days' time ever since he left (time indeed flies).

 I wanna thank Zaobao for approaching me and giving me this opportunity to release all the nostalgic feelings I've kept inside me for the longest time,

as well as letting me share the memories I've had with my dad, 

with everyone who used to love him (his fans!). 

It was my first time writing in mandarin and having it published

(the nearest I've gotten was all the chinese compos I wrote in school, haha).

I am now quite rusty in chinese writing actually, 

but I guess there's just too much feelings for me to express 

hence writing this eulogy wasn't half as hard. 

I used to be really good in mandarin okay (my English used to suck big time),

but after I entered poly, everything was written and done in english,

that was when I lost touch with mandarin.

(on the bright side, my english improved tremendously lah).

 I'm sure it can be read the pixel is pretty big.

Click it, right click "view image", and zoom as you please.

Anyway, it was easy finding the right things to pen down
(because there's just too many),

but not easy to write at all
(overwhelming thoughts and emotions).

It took me quite awhile to finish because there were plenty of pauses

(found myself walking down the memory lane wayyyyyy too many times).

I would say we have moved on with our lives,

but a part of us still seems to be missing, somewhere.

The fact is, that part isn't lost because

it will never be found;

pretending its lost is what's keeping us sane & going.

Madam Tussauds wax museum opening

I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone who has shown support or words of encouragement to me in many ways, 

sorry couldn't possibly reply to all of it but no worries, I've seen each and every of them :)

I am brought up to have a strong acceptance of comments, the good or bad.

I have to because of who my dad is.

I've seen lots of negative comments and honestly none of them gets to me personally.

Although most people thinks my dad deserves the wax figure, but there are still a handful of negative comments doubting his significance.

Trust me, I am more than okay when I come across these comments.

Being a straight forward person,

I get how it feels when you get flamed by people just because your opinion isn't aligned with the majority.

That's why I couldn't stress this enough;

I am not unhappy with Jonathan saying my dad has no contribution,

 and asking why my dad was chosen.

I am unhappy simply because he said my dad got a wax figure, 

because he died.

Jonathan isn't the only one who disagrees my dad's significance.

I've seen a few who thinks the same like him too.

& I am not at all upset by their comments,

because they are not wrong to speak how they feel,

so long as they don't show disrespect along the way.

Social media nowadays are not clear on the facts,

they try to make things as wry/misleading as they could so that readers can expand their imaginations and of course, make the overall story even more interesting than the original one.

 Articles online are making me sound like an overprotective daughter who couldn't stand just the tiniest bit of negative comment made of my dad.

Trust me, I am used to it and no, I'm not petty like that
:)

*****

With all these issues aside, 

I would like to share a bit more on the Madam Tussauds wax museum opening night I've attended last Thursday.

Many other famous characters are featured in the museum and some of them really look almost 99% alike the real person.

I didn't take pictures with all the wax figures, just a few.

Spent most of the time getting nice pictures with my dad, of course.

I was happy with the area they placed my dad at, it has good lighting on and people can take nice pictures with him.

The boat ride is an additional attraction in the museum.

Was actually invited for the boat ride, but turned out it wasn't ready yet :(

Really love this picture of Mr and Mrs Lee Kuan Yew.

Some commented that they're being dressed too casually.

However, I think dressing them casually portrays them better as the Father and Mother of Singapore.

 This dress up exudes a more approachable and loving feel which I think they are going for.

This is definitely better than suits and formal dress.

Really look like how we were in the past.

I used to cling on his arms around like so.

:)

We were all pretty famished after the exhibition so we headed to Vivo for late dinner.

Forgotten the bar restaurant name, but am pretty sure it's a German bar.

Their King prawn black truffle pasta is really good.

Not so much about the fries though, the chilli crab dip was a disappointment.

Moments

I'm never good at walking down memory lanes, but I do that all the time.
I guess it's my guilty pleasure to escape the present once in a while.
I don't deny that sometimes guilty pleasure takes a bit too long and
I'll tend to stuck there for quite some time,
but I love to close my eyes and play pretend the whole afternoon,
that I'm back to where I was, replaying every bit of the past
as though I am reliving them again.
At times it gets a little difficult when,
those parts involve people or things that no longer exist in the present.
They tend to get a little foggy and unfamiliar against my will and
somehow it hurts a little knowing that I'm losing touch of them.

Pictures do help.
I am forever thankful for them.
We'll never know just how much that single snap of the camera means to us,
until what's left is the picture, and what's in the picture, is history.

Undeserving

Loving me is never be easy.

I come with the toughest exterior,

and the most complicated instructions.

I can't help it because

I'm made that way.

Loving me is never easy.

I may be honest but I conceal my emotions.
In return I spill words that sting like daggers,

just so that my end of the stick ain't shorter.

Loving me will never be easy.

I told you that. 

I said I'm the toughest nut to crack 

but you cracked it anyway.

Things did not work but 

they didn't go to waste.

At least I know you've tried,

it wasn't all in vain. 

You told me how difficult it is to love me,

I wish I knew what to say.

I may never find the next but it's okay,
no one in their right mind should ever stay.

N

Bee kay kay treep

Managed to take some time off my boring work life and go for a short getaway.
Not my first time there but it was only a short trip so settled for bkk.

It was an awesome trip overall, despite some hiccups here and there.

Subtle photobomb again

Took Tigerair although I've always had this bad impression of the airline.

I've lost part of my faith in airplanes after seeing so many accidents recently.

The going trip was good and it eased my doubts about airplanes, but the coming back trip was my worst nightmare

(will get to that later)

Met up with a few Bangkok friends and they took us to Huahin.

Here are some pictures taken during the road trip stopover.

It was quite a long journey on the van but the moment we reached the villa,

we were all taken aback by how awesome it is.

It's a family villa owned by one of their friends, with amazing seaside view, 12 5-star standard rooms, a dining hall and a pool.

 

It's breathtaking, idk what else to say.

Everyone was so excited, we spent hours taking pictures.

Everything felt like a dream.

We showered at our individual rooms and then headed out for dinner.

They brought us to this really nice bar overseeing the beach view.

"I suggest we go drink before drinking"

 

Headed back to the villa for hard core drinks.

We blasted music and played games while pushing each other in the pool.

By the end of the night I got so high (in a good way) and started pool dancing and kept asking people to feed me alcohol from the bottle.

I was so ridiculous. I even taught our bangkok friends how to "EH WAH" hahahaha.

They were so enthu about it just imagine everyone dancing and swimming around going "EH-WAH EH WAH EH WAH".

Woke up with a very slight hangover the next morning because we needa wake up early to travel back to the city.

Road trip once again but everyone slept in the van,

we were all drained from last night pretty much.

We stayed in the suite of S Sukhumvit (next to terminal 21).

It was sooooo nice, even up till now I'm feeling home sick for it.

Didn't take pictures of the room, kinda forgotten.

Me and R unpacked and headed to terminal 21 for shabu shabu.

Their Shabu Shabu wins Singapore's, hands down.

Only 20+ per pax (buffet btw).

Singapore's  Shabu restaurants charge a hefty price for shabu shabu (30+ or 40+ per pax?),

and yet not really fantastic.

At this particular shabu restaurant resided at the corner of terminal 21,
I had the best shabu experience.
I cooked my beef slice in the sukiyaki soup for less than a minute,

and my beef is already fully marinated by the sukiyaki.

Singapore's sukiyaki soup may be flavorful,

but it doesn't really sink into the meat quite like that.
(Of course, I am not comparing this to very expensive shabu shabu restaurants in SG)

Met up with Irene and her bf for some drinks at night.

This crazy girl suggested we go to Bangkok's so called "geylang area",

because she wanna see lady boys.

So we went, and we went to this bar with very cheap beer,

while showing skimpy girls pole dancing on the stage.

Wasn't so bad, the people were friendly and didn't seem to be cons.

We proceed to find lady boys after some drinks.

We walked through the streets and ended up in this upstairs bar full of fat girls doing ping pong shows.

(Shooting balls out from their vaginas).

Some of the balls hit me and I was slightly disgusted LOL.
Couldn't stand the balls touching me when they came straight out from their vaginas.

We knew this bar is gonna cheat our money but we still went for it.

Quoting Irene:

"I want them to force me pay a lot of money! and when I didn't they will call mafia omg so dangerous and exciting!"

& as expected, they did.

We paid for our drinks, but a few of them stopped us, forcing us to pay 6700 baht (268 sgd)

when our bill was only 1000 baht?

We declined payment and they threatened to call mafia by dialing their phones

(R saw them dialing with their home screen still on lol, fake calls)

Lucky for us, we saw this coming, we already hid our money in our bras or underwear.

We flipped our wallets out on them and with our very good attempt on acting,

they only managed to squeeze 3000 baht from us (120 sgd for 4 person).

Not so bad lah at least, and they let us go. 

We were lucky, as I've heard recounts of very bad experience from other people where the mafias really came down to give them a hard time.

Irene: Sian never see mafia! I want the mafia to force me pay money and I'll keep saying nono please don't hurt me.

HAHAHA.

***

The next day we started off our day with my favourite beef noodle!

This is honestly the best beef noodle you can find.

Idk what exactly the address is (I only know how to walk there).

Its very near to Baiyoke Sky hotel.

 

Me and R had like 2 big bowls each.

I started missing it again right after 5 minutes I step out of the shop.

Went Chatuchak after that.

Didn't buy as many things as I expected though, but we managed to get some interesting stuffs.

I always walk among areas 1-4 only (because they have air-con there).

Other areas are simply too stuffy for me.

Wanted to have my favourite coconut ice cream but was too full from the noodles :(

Went to meet up with our bangkok friends for dinner and club at Escobar.

The club feels exclusive and mainly locals go there as we don't see any foreigners.

They have very good food too!

We ordered a fried rice and that was the best fried rice we had in Bkk.

 We went inside after dinner and our friends' table is filled with bottles of alcohol.

We drank so much, there's live band,

the club is amazing and their atmosphere's really good.

R got drunk in the end though.

It was so funny because before coming to bkk,

he swore to not get drunk at foreign places and will take good care of me.

"I don't dare to drink till drunk at overseas one! So dangerous what if something happen to you?"

A big Yeah right.

Turned out I took care of him and brought him back to the hotel.

The next morning I made him thank me so many times and be thankful that he has a girlfriend who isn't a weak girly girl if not he could've slept outside the club.

Despite the hangover, R made the effort to wash up and head out with me because I kept whining that it's nearing to the end of the trip.

We went to Siam after praying and walked around.

 Met up with Boong for a dirt cheap mookata buffet!

Only $8sgd per pax (YES NO KIDDING)

They have live performance too.

The mookata's good and very authentic (very local feel)

 We sat and chit chat for awhile before heading to Asiatique.

It's something like SG's Clarke Quay, but only a million times better.

I loveee the place so much. It has good view, good shopping and good bars.

 

Went back to hotel early because we were all pretty exhausted

(probably due to previous night's party)

We checked out from our room at noon the next day and went to Chinatown for shark fin!

& I finally sat on my favourite tuktuk!

Joked about wanting to be a tuk tuk driver someday.

N: I'm migrating to thailand for work.. I'm sorry but it's over between us

R: Huh?! it's so sudden why didn't you discuss it with me?

N: It's my life and it's what I want, it's my career, my dream.

R: But you mentioned nothing about migrating! The company there accepted you?

N: Yes, I'm leaving next monday.. 

R: ... at least let me know what you're doing over there.

N: I'm hired to be a tuk tuk driver.

.....

ok lame, but we had fun role playing on the tuk tuk hahaha.

Told R I'll be the most successful tuk tuk driver because I'm the only pretty girl driving it.

R said that since I'm so bad at directions I would probably get lost most of the time and when the customer blamed me, I will turn my anxiousness into anger and chase them off my tuk tuk.

We went on saying that I will be up on the news and everyone will be aware of this gold digger tuk tuk driver who chases you off her vehicle before taking you to where you need to go.

We went to platinum mall for shopping before heading back to our hotel and then to the airport.

We were stuck in the traffic towards the airport for 2 hours and guess what?

WE MISSED OUR GODDAMN FLIGHT.

However, we were so, so, so (couldn't emphasize this more), lucky, Boong booked a room at the hotel near the airport where people usually has to reserve in advance when they have plane stopovers. 

She booked it by mistake for her friend.

& so happen, she only booked a day, and it was on the day we missed our flight.

CREEPY?

Not yet but I'll get there.

We then rebooked a morning flight back to SG the next day.

So lucky us, with a roof over our heads and a bed to sleep on.

We went to the airport 2 hours early the next day and successfully boarded our flight.

But I freaked out on the plane.

The pilot announced that we are arriving SG in 5 mins.

The plane descended till the point where I'm able to see trees and buildings.

Everyone thought it's landing time.

Out of a sudden, the plane on its engine again and started going up (at high speed) till all we could see were clouds (that's damn high).

This went on for 20 minutes with no further announcement, whatsoever.

Steward and stewardess both looked anxious.

WOULD YOU BE WORRIED?

& to top it off,

the plane was super jerky, turning left and right nonstop, literally non stop.

Why would a plane keep switching directions?

It felt faulty and insecure.

I swear there must be some cock ups that the pilots didn't disclose, and hence the long 20minutes silence.

I sat there with sweaty palms and fear, feeling as if in any next second, the plane is going down.

It was a horrible experience.

After that 20 minutes, suddenly the plane descended again, but in a very very unstable way.

I thought we're gonna Mayday,

but luckily, it landed.

Can you imagine my fear?

Like just so happen I missed my previous flight to go on this flight,

and just so happen my friend booked a hotel which we needed because we missed our flight.

Feels very fateful to me, like all's planned for us to be on that plane (if anything tragic happened).

 SCARY HOLY MOLEY SHIT.

Not gonna fly Tigerair ever again no matter how good their timings are or how cheap.

Tigerair simply destroyed my love for taking planes.

Now I'm scarred for life.

Anw, I'm currently suffering a really bad post vacation blues.

Writing this entry in my office is making it worse.

But lastly I wanna thank my friends at Bkk for making this trip so memorable.

Would love to go back soon someday 

(but definitely not flying there on Tigerair)